Imaginery Interviews

Charles E. Hughes: " I attended a skit of the State Department Dramatic Club in which I was represented on the stage. Asked an interviewer : ' Mr. Secretary, can you tell us the height of the Washington Monument ? ' My double replied: ' Really I can't comment on that; but I may say confidentially that it is said to be 555 feet high.' "

Ex-Governor Allen of Kansas: "I am visiting in Greece and have been received with great eclat by King, Ministers and populace. Says the Embros (Athens paper): 'No foreigner in history ever won the hearts of the Greek people so completely.' I am afraid, however, that I share my honors with Lord By-ron."

Joseph Conrad: " On arriving in America I told reporters: 'Writing is a frightful grind.' I then retired to the home of my host, Frank N. Doubleday, to rest for several days and recover from an attack of lumbago and gout."

Captain Eddie Rickenbacker, speedway and airway ace: " I told reporters in Atlanta that the demand for quicker transportation has ' made ' the automobile and will in turn make the flying machine. Also that I prefer airplane flying-- ' There is less likelihood of accidents in the air.'

Blanche Bates: "While I was acting at the Broad Street Theatre in Philadelphia a fire panic almost started. Said I to the audience: ' There's no fire in this theatre, and what the hell would you do if there were ? Hold up your hands, all who are going to stay.' And they held them up."

Jeritza: " I was enthusiastically received in my native Vienna, where I am going to sing Tosca with the prices for seats 'the highest ever charged.' Reporters would not believe me, however, when I told them that in New York opera seats came as high as seven dollars."

Edward of Wales: " Aux Ecoutes, Paris weekly, declared that I will renounce the throne in favor of the Duke of York. According to account, I sent Albert to call on my matchmaking relatives, bidding him 'tell them if they want a king, I am here; but if they must have a queen, too, then I renounce in your favor.'"

Herbert Hoover, Secretary of Commerce: "My department published a news-release entitled Foodstuffs 'Round the World. It bore the headline: 'Swiss Cheese Stages Strong Comeback.'"

M. Clemenceau: "My physicians and friends are worried because I have taken a serious cold. Indeed, I have not been well since the death of ma chere amie, Sarah Bernhardt,"