McAndrew's Cure

Commonly recommended as remedies for seasickness are champagne, chewing lemons, going to bed for the first two days, pills, thinking of other things.

William McAndrew, refugee from stormy political seas as a onetime Super intendent of Schools in Chicago, recently suggested belladonna plasters for seasickness. As editor of the Educational Review he was mindful of a current propensity among patient pedagogs for elaborate research and profound tabulations. Placing his tongue ever so slightly in his cheek, Dr. McAndrew tabulated his belladonna-plasters-for-seasickness research as follows: Number reporting having used bella donna plasters..............6 Number reporting having escaped from sea sickness..........6 Median................................................................. ................................6 Correlation............................................................ ................Per cent. 100 Number seen by me who said they were wearing 'em...........5 Number of such whom I saw daily unailing..................................5 Average................................................................ .................................5 Correlation............................................................ .................Per cent. 100 Number of physicians questioned..................................................1 Number saying the plaster should be effacious .........................1 Per cent. ....................................................................... .........................100

The plasters should be applied delicately to the pit of the stomach. Wrote impish Mr. McAndrew: "Closer than a brother will this preserver of composure cling, even through your daily baths, until, at last, on terra firma once more, there comes the quick sharp pang of parting."