"Gott Schutzt Deutschland!"

Pack-jammed with German ham actors and actresses, a creaking bus coughed and sputtered across Hanover last week amid dense fog toward the troupe's next one-night stand. ";Ich kann gar nichts sehen. I can't see a thing" grumbled the bus driver. Just then he crashed through a railway safety gate, jammed his bus on the tracks.

Far away something shrieked. Then the dull glow of a headlight stabbed out of the fog. Before the terrified actors could move, straight through them and their bus plowed the special train of Realmleader Adolf Hitler, traveling at more than 100 kilometers per hour.

Der Fuhrer's train was brought to an emergency stop nearly two kilometers from the collision. Alighting with Economic Dictator Dr. Hjalmar Schacht and Defense Minister General Werner von Blomberg, Herr Hitler strode back through the fog. At the fatal crossing he found 13 corpses. Seven other actors were groaning in pain. Above the dead Realmleader Hitler made his supreme gesture, the Nazi salute. Then, strong-nerved, he plunged into the work of collecting bits of mangled bodies and arranging them under sheets. This took an hour. The seven injured were taken away to hospitals, one dying en route. A fresh engine was hitched to the Realmleader's special. ''It was a miracle!" cried the Nazi engineer. "A miracle that the train of our beloved Fuhrer did not leave the rails. Gott schiitzt Deutschland! God protects Germany."

Over the ordered dead Adolf Hitler again made the sign of the Nazi, clicked his heels, climbed back into his private car, continued on his way from Bremen to Berlin.

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