Umbrella

Far more familiar to Europeans than Anthony Eden's famed black Homburg is British Prime Minister Neville Chamberlain's black, rolled umbrella. Last week a newshawk from the London Daily Express sought out the salesman from whom Mr. Chamberlain bought it. With characteristic British clarity, the salesman described it: "It's what one might call a Rolls-Royce of an umbrella, natty but quiet, solid but a light dasher. The sort of umbrella which becomes part of a man, if I may say so."

Mr. Chamberlain has come to regard his gamp as a necessary part of his journeys abroad and last week, before pursuing "appeasement" to Rome, he told friends the story of an old lady with an umbrella, who, pursued by a lion, suddenly turned, unfurled her weapon and scared the beast away. Concluded Mr. Chamberlain: "And I am taking my umbrella to Rome."

Mr. Chamberlain had a chance to unfurl his umbrella but once--during a thunderstorm, which Rome wisecrackers said had been ordered by God to show that the rolled umbrella really opened. While he certainly did not scare II Duce with it, on this appeasement trip, at any rate, Mr. Chamberlain was not scared into giving anything away. Nothing good went Italy's way and nothing bad went Britain's. In this way Britain came off with a sort of negative triumph.

Arranged three months ago in the rosy afterglow of the Munich Deal, the trip was not expected to amount to much more than the formalizing of a standoff. This prospect was underscored when, much to II Duce's disappointment, the British stopped "for tea" with Premier Edouard Daladier and Foreign Minister Georges Bonnet in Paris. There they were informed once again that France will not countenance Mr. Chamberlain as a "mediator" to settle Italian-French troubles.

Unlike his far shrewder halfbrother, the late Sir Austen Chamberlain, a skilled diplomat and linguist, Mr. Chamberlain is singularly unequipped for his "personal" chats with the leaders of other nations. During his November visit to Paris he disappointed French radio listeners by saying "I can speak no French." Last week he showed that he had at least learned something. Saying farewell to M. Daladier he beamed: "Merci, thank you, Merci, monsieur, beaucoup, beaucoup, beaucoup!"

In Rome no interpreters were necessary since II Duce speaks fluent English. Premier Mussolini rushed forward and pump-handled his guest vigorously, then accompanied him to the palatial Villa Madama. Italian Foreign Minister Count Ciano warmly greeted Lord Halifax. There was nothing of the lavish display put on in Rome for Adolf Hitler's visits. Total cost of Mr. Chamberlain's three-day entertainment was only $5,000. But the Italian people, many of whom believe that it was the British statesman and not II Duce who kept them out of a war in September, gave Mr. Chamberlain a warm welcome. Vivas were chalked on doorsteps and wherever Mr. Chamberlain went he was greeted with genuine hand claps. Rome's supply of umbrellas was bought out.

When it came to talking, there was not much for the two diplomats to talk about. As to Spain, Signor Mussolini indicated he expected a Franco victory soon, and when that was achieved it would be time enough to talk further about Italy's demands on France. (An Italianate Spain would probably put France in a bargaining mood.) He was willing to discuss the plight of the Jews with other powers, but to send none to Ethiopia. He amiably reaffirmed the Anglo-Italian friendship pledge of 1938. Net: zero. To underscore the zero Mr. Chamberlain also called on the Pope (see p. 36).

Italians were obviously dissatisfied with the results of the fruitless conference. The official spokesman had nothing to say the day after the talks ended. Observers scoffed at Mr. Chamberlain for coming to Rome to learn no more than what the British Ambassador to Rome could have, and probably had, told him. Mr. Chamberlain remained optimistic to the last and when he said farewell to II Duce, he was wearing his best public smile. "Not good-by," he remarked to his host, "but au revoir." "Au revoir," smiled II Duce, "and soon." Back in London, Mr. Chamberlain received a reception not likely to influence him to return to Italy "soon." No member of his Cabinet bothered to come to the station.

This file is automatically generated by a robot program, so reader's discretion is required.