Monday, Mar. 25, 1940

Words In Pittsburgh, Pa., Walter J. Morrison filed a 10,000-word complaint against his wife. Remarking that it was longer than Gone With the Wind, Judge M. A. Musmanno countered tersely with a 68-word divorce grant.

Wanted

In Memphis, Tenn., the Commercial Appeal carried the following advertisement: WANTED: no citizens willing to loan $1 each to pay my fine, when I was forced to break the traffic law, so I can be released and earn money to pay a lawyer to prove my innocence of other charges. T. L. Christy.

Watchdog

In Rochester, N.Y., burglars took $75 worth of merchandise from a filling station. Part of their loot: the collar of a police dog left to guard the premises.

Name

In Danville, Va., a marriage license clerk asked a Negro applicant his name. Answer. Judger Virlie Birdiron Masson-dail William Harris.

Pet

In Carlstadt, N. J., Mr. and Mrs. William Mercoun advertised: "WANTED: a good home for a 600-lb. cinnamon bear; gentle; won't touch beer, bathes regularly."

Brothers

In Rushville, Ind., Cecil S. and Raymond Moore, brothers who married two sisters on the same day in 1936, filed suit for divorce simultaneously.

Case

In Washington, Pa., a jury of five women and seven men acquitted a defendant of unlawful transportation of beer, ordered the State to pay 60% of the costs. While considering their verdict they consumed one case of the evidence against the defendant.

Legs

In Riverhead, L.I. William Fitting, taxi driver, sued a utilities company for bodily injury because he tripped on a valve, broke both his wooden legs. He won.

Escape

In Elgin, Ore., a high wind sent Leo Carlson's privy tumbling to the ground. In it was Leo Carlson. Said the hometown paper: "He found that the only mode of escape was through a porthole."

Speeder

In Toledo, Ohio, Harold Holt missed a banquet where he was to receive an award for safe driving. Reason: on the way, he was arrested for speeding.

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