Meatless. In Washington, the War Food Administration made out its usual paychecks to Employes Mary Bean, George Fruit, Maybert Corn, Samuel G. Salmon, Esther Olive, William Meal and Fairfax Oyster. Mr. Oyster is an expert on peanuts.

Hats Off. In Detroit, Mrs. M. Clegg's advertisement of an electrolytic depilatory announced that it would "permanently and safely" remove "unsightly hats."

Oddity. In Manhattan, San Francisco Municipal Attorney Dion Holm was granted train reservations by ODT to go home and fight a case against ODT.

Strike. In Schenectady, N.Y., Arthur L. Stockmore investigated a third-floor trap door, found 84 quarts of pre-Prohibition whiskey in a secret room.

The News. In Caldwell, Idaho, Mrs. William Paulson received a thoroughgoing account of her husband's activities as a second lieutenant in Egypt. It was written by his houseboy, in Arabic.

Counter Point. In Omaha, Neb., Post Office Clerk Neil Chapman braced himself for the remarks of a lady who approached him with one of the office's pens. She wanted the pen point's name & number because it wrote so well.

Lone Wolf. In Rio de Janeiro, the police reported the number of loving couples arrested on blacked-out Copacabana Beach: 33 1/2.

Hoist. In Washington, the Post Office Department took routine steps to send bond posters to East Bridgewater, Mass., addressed East Bridgewater's allotment on its own machines, got East Bridgewater's package back, stamped "insufficient address."

Feathered Friend. In Billings, Mont., a wild eagle attacked a bartender, his mirror and his stock, after appearing sedately on the shoulder of a customer who disclaimed the damage by explaining that the bird was merely a street acquaintance.

Signer. In Atlanta, U.S. Attorney Raymond W. Martin asked a man why he had not signed up for the draft. "I did," the man replied. "But I don't know whether it was the draft or for sugar."

Nicety. In London, a writer for the Spectator remarked that "I had nothing to do with naming ... in the County of Morayshire a parish named Bellie. . . . But I cannot but express satisfaction that the Church of Scotland should have manifested such a sense of the proprieties as to appoint to it a little time ago a minister named the Rev. Mr. Venters."

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