Night Flight. In Walkerton, Ont., fined $40 and costs for careless driving, Andrew Frieburger, 72, told the magistrate that he ordinarily drove his car by celestial navigation, but lost his bearings and wound up in a ditch when he mistook a TV tower light for the evening star.

Point of Honor. In Great Falls, Mont., picked up on a drunk charge, Louis Cadoret was fined twice the usual amount after he insisted to police that his occupation be listed as "professional shoplifter."

The Honeymoon. In Christchurch, N.Z., Landlord J. Robinson loudly complained to the local Land Valuation Court that the young couple who had rented a beach cottage from him for their 1938 honeymoon still occupied the place, despite the birth of their four children and the fruitless efforts he had made to oust them.

Unrehearsed. In San Francisco, police arrested Carley Neef, 36, after she approached a teller in the Bank of America's downtown branch, demanded he hand over the money, then burst into tears, cried: "Call a guard, please, I'm trying to hold up the bank!"

Why, Teacher? In Redford, Mich., after police installed electric traffic timers near a local school crossing at the repeated behest of anxious townspeople, four schoolteachers were ticketed for speeding within the first two weeks.

Curb Service. In Fairfax County, Va., police looked for the gunman who drove up quietly to the ticket window of a drive-in movie wearing a paper bag over his head with eye holes cut in it, poked a pistol at Cashier Helen Franklin, reached out of the car and grabbed $1,100, drove away.

Unfair Advantage. In London, after being fined -L-5 ($14) for stealing from a self-service store, Mrs. May Hampton, 43, complained indignantly in court: "The public should be protected from this kind of shop; you can go in and steal anything and no one is the wiser."

Headquarters Casualty. In Sydney, Australia, Marjorie O'Brien demanded -L-8 16s, ($20) weekly workman's compensation, charged that she had suffered nervous tension, emotional strain, "aggravation" of high blood pressure while working as a secretary for the Workmen's Compensation Commission.

The Great Man. In Columbus, Ohio, Nathan S. Beck got a letter in the mail with only his photo and city as an address, found later that his friend L. G. Lundstrom had sent the letter from California to determine if he really "was a big shot in his home town."

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