Marlon v. Mao

The Ugly American, based on the 1958 bestseller in which Eugene Burdick and William Lederer angrily arraigned the arrogance, ignorance and indifference of Americans stationed abroad, was initially intended as a slashing attack on the sort of official who thinks he can heal the world's wounds by rubbing gold in them. It turns out to be just one more installment of Terry and the Pirates.

But no Dragon Lady. And hardly even a plot. U.S. Ambassador Marlon Brando--please do not laugh; this is a serious, Eastman Color picture--arrives at his post in South Sarkhan (read South Viet Nam) and hustles off to see an old friend, a fellow he knew in the resistance who has now become a leading neutralist.

"Deong!"

"Mac!"

"How are ya, kid?"

"Fine! I'm so anxious to meet Marion!"

"Marion's dyin' to meet you! If you aren't doin' anythin' tomorra night, come on over!"

Clever people, these Indo-Chinese. After talking like a Hollywood scriptwriter, Deong begins to talk like a Communist agent ("Cuba is what you made it! . . . We don't want tanks from Wall Street!"). Brando sees red and decides Deong really must be one. With Washington's approval the ambassador launches a political offensive which backfires. Deong, driven to revolt, makes common cause with the Communists and overwhelms the rightist regime supported by the U.S. But on the eve of victory, Deong is assassinated by his Communist allies. Only Marlon Brando now stands between Southeast Asia and Mao's hordes.

One senses that the Actors Studio has not entirely prepared him for the responsibility. He attempts an important voice, but most of the time he sounds like a small boy in a bathtub imitating Winston Churchill. He ventures a diplomatic brush, but his upper lip produces merely a promising smear. He sports an expensive cutaway, but the more he tries to be elegant the more he looks like a stevedore at his daughter's wedding. Through the stuffed shirt peeps the T shirt, and at his most ambassadorial moments Marlon is unmistakably a man who longs to scratch. The customers will probably feel the same. It's the natural reaction to a lousy picture.

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