People

By Michele Orecklin

SOMEDAY THIS WILL ALL SEEM FUNNY

For a man notoriously obsessed with cleanliness, JERRY SEINFELD seems to get himself implicated in some pretty messy situations. No longer playing a lovable version of himself on a sitcom, the comedian has been cast in a slightly less endearing role--as the other man in a New York City couple's divorce. Last week Seinfeld was publicly linked with JESSICA SKLAR, 26, who reportedly has not let her four-month-old marriage stand in the way of her dating. Sklar apparently began seeing Seinfeld, whom she met at the gym, mere weeks after returning from her honeymoon with Eric Nederlander, whose family owns a stake in the New York Yankees. Nederlander's spokesman, Howard Rubenstein, says the jilted groom has already filed for divorce and blames the comedian for the demise of his marriage. But has Seinfeld been "double dipping"? While dating Sklar, he was also rumored to be seeing Jennifer Crittenden, a co-producer on his show.

NEXT: MENUDO JOINS THE SECURITY COUNCIL

In a jarring example of the changing face of global diplomacy, GERI HALLIWELL, formerly Ginger Spice, last week embarked on her career as a United Nations goodwill ambassador with a can-do spirit and a string of mild expletives. "I'm damn well going to use my fame positively!" the newly decolletage-free pop star exclaimed at a U.N. press conference. So while her former bandmates tour the world, Halliwell, 26, will preach to it. She'll stump for the U.N. Population Fund, promoting family-planning issues in developing countries that may not know enough about birth control but are surely familiar with the Spice Girls. At the press conference, Halliwell admitted she doesn't really know what she's doing, but as anyone who's heard her sing can attest, that has never stopped her before.

OH SOW CHIC

Though the exact location of porcine pulse points remains elusive, MISS PIGGY, the megalomaniacal muppet with a fetish for frogs, next month launches her own scent, Moi, a perfume that smells as sweet as honey-baked ham. Asked why anyone would want to wear something that smells good to a pig, Miss Piggy, or, more precisely, the people who speak for her, insist that "elegance and sex appeal transcend species."

FOR THOSE WHO HAVE HEARD ENOUGH FROM SAM AND COKIE...

Last week Rolling Stone published a special issue surveying various musicians on the Clinton scandal. A sampler:

WILLIE NELSON I always thought a grand jury was a big secret thing. I've been before a grand jury before, and I took the Fifth about 20 times, and maybe Bill ought to have done the same thing.

STEVIE WONDER People [used] to scream about explicit lyrics in rap music. Today those same people...put explicit information on the Internet for any child to see...I'm glad I'm blind and can't see it.

MARILYN MANSON Do they have backstage passes for the Oval Office? I don't think he deserves to be impeached, but if he is, he always has a job with me. He can be my tour manager, test-drive the girls for me.

JOAN OSBORNE If you're married to Hillary Clinton, why the hell would you want to mess around with Monica Lewinsky? Why go out for a cheeseburger when you can have filet mignon at home?